Vive les Vacances

So, here I am on holiday, sitting in my son’s living room on a wet Sunday on the shortest day of the year. Wow. It’s amazing when you leave your home and hearth and move yourself away from those thousand things you feel you should be doing. I feel utterly decadent since I have been here in Andalusia. I have done nothing more than hang out with my son, daughter, grandchildren and the father of my kids. I believe that sometimes it’s a good thing to stand back, take time to reflect or just enjoy time out.

Although I’ve realized this time is good for me, I didn’t change the word decadent in writing this because it means I’m still sometimes operating in “by me mode”that means not letting go, trying to control things and

make things happen. Yet I know—as we surely all do, but lose sight of—what we really need to do is navigate the ebbs and flows of life with grace and resilience, awareness and acceptance.

This “time out” period has involved playing with my grandchildren, going to see the latest “Avatar,” a three-hour film by James Cameron about an imaginary world of avatars being pillaged and exploited by a very Imperialistic-like military elite. The images are spectacular, with a virtual “world” of people and tribes, imaginary flying and swimming beasts, dedicated to nature and to an organic lifestyle fighting against this military elite. I must admit, although it’s full of fighting ànd the good ones pitched against the baddies, the visual images and technical prowess was stunning. I was even so caught up in it that I dropped my cinema treat, a box of salted popcorn, at one point, spreading a lot of it over the floor!

Being away is also giving me time to reflect on my reasons for writing this Substack post, and this is what I want to share:

This Substack post is about love, life and relationships —but perhaps not in the way we are usually taught to think about them.

It is especially for women who have lived a little. Women who have loved, lost, tried, failed, adapted, survived, and evolved. Women who may now be wondering — quietly or loudly —what next?

There is a persistent, unspoken message in our culture that as women age, life narrows. That we should become more reasonable, more invisible, more careful. That adventure, reinvention, desire, creativity, and boldness belong to the young.

I don’t believe that for a second.

I believe that later life can be richer, freer, more playful, more honest, and more meaningful—
if we are willing to keep working on ourselves, questioning old stories, and stepping outside our comfort zones.

This is not a space for fixing yourself.
You are not broken.
Nor is it about pretending everything is positive all the time.

It is a space for

• Honest reflection about love and relationships — including the one with yourself

• Letting go of limiting beliefs about age, worth, and “too late”

• Reclaiming curiosity, courage, pleasure, and aliveness

• Becoming a beginner again — imperfectly and bravely

• Laughing at yourself while still taking your life seriously

I write as an older woman myself — not as an expert above you, but as a companion alongside you.
Someone still learning, still questioning, still stepping forward.

If you feel that your life is not over — just unfinished
If you sense there is still more joy, more truth, more freedom available to you
If you are willing to grow rather than shrink

Then you are very welcome here.

This chapter of life can be magnificent.
Let’s explore it together.

That said, now for the next ten days I can enjoy my holiday or, as we say in French, “Vive les vacances.”

If you are interested, contact me either through Substack or simply by email: cherryl@aniane.net.

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